Boss: You make too many mistakes! You’re not very consistent at your work.
Cube dweller: Well, you can’t be consistent all the time!
Liverpool
England
- Posted on
- Bosses and Underlings, England, Gripes
Male peon #1: Does anybody want anything from the vending machine?
Female peon: Bring me back some Jesus!
Male peon #2: I’ll just take a ginger ale.
Boston, Massachusetts
- Posted on
- Coworkers, Massachusetts, Meals and Snacks, Religion
Trashy coworker: Don’t ya hate when you’re on the rag and your husband rolls over in the night with a boner, wantin’ to poke ya?
Franklin Street
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Violet White
- Posted on
- Coworkers, Gripes, Massachusetts
Values trainer, on being equal opportunity employer: … And, just so you know, the Midwest office gave an offer to a paraplegic last month. He’s paralyzed from the neck down — can’t move anything below the neck. So there’s a great example of the firm walking the talk.
55 East 52nd Street
New York, New York
- Posted on
- Consultants, New York, Office Politics
Service manager: We are not here to motivate employees. We are here to make them do their jobs.
Mavis Road
Mississauga, Ontario
Canadia
- Posted on
- Canadia, Dumb Bosses, Office Politics
Colleague, about her cat: Ever since I got those balloons delivered to my house on my birthday, she’s really been into rubber.
Yonge Street and St. Clair Avenue
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Male peon to another: Now I have to go and wash my butt, and that’s no fun!
1176 Crooks Road
Troy, Michigan
Office girl #1: White chocolate is such a sham. They take out the best part.
Office girl #2: The brown?
Southlake, Texas
- Posted on
- Coworkers, Meals and Snacks, Texas
Bimbette #1: We are so lucky we can’t have forest fires here in Georgia.
Teacher: Forest fires can happen anywhere.
Bimbette #2: Nah, you gotta be closer to the equator than Georgia.
123 Broad Street
Dacula, Georgia
Overheard by: smokey the bear
- Posted on
- Bimbettes, General Idiocy, Georgia
Waitress #1: I can’t tuck this corner. I suck at folding napkins.
Waitress #2: We should just make a monopoly line with this.
Waitress #1: [Stares blankly.]Waitress #2: You know, a monopoly line? I’ll start it, you finish it. We’ll get this done faster.
34 Cooper Square
New York, New York
