20-ish female associate: Yeah, and you should see her hair! She dyed it red.
20-ish male associate: Really? How red? Like, Netflix-red?
20-ish female associate: No! Worse than that. Like Tandoori chicken-red!
Middle-aged male associate: Wait, wait, wait — what on Earth are you two talking about? What ever happened to fire engine-red and candy apple-red? [Met with silent, blank stares, then waves his hand in disdain] Bah! You kids nowadays are all freaks!
Ann Arbor, Michigan
Worker bee: There’s nothing more romantic than porn falling on your head…
Palmer Street
Missoula, Montana
- Posted on
- Coworkers, General Idiocy, Montana
Office weirdo: Most people don’t realize that mermaids actually have sharp teeth — similar to a shark. They also eat fish… So they have really bad breath.
Washington, DC
- Posted on
- Creepsters, Gossip, Washington DC
Peon #1: So, how’s that burn on your arm?
Peon #2: It kind of looks like prime rib.
1750 East Golf Road
Schaumburg, Illinois
Overheard by: Emily
- Posted on
- Coworkers, Illinois, Meals and Snacks, Questions
Office assistant #1: Oh, I see you got braces. Congrats. But aren’t they awfully expensive?
Office assistant #2: Yeah, but it’s worth it… At least my future children will have straight teeth!
Moscow
Russia
- Posted on
- Coworkers, General Idiocy, Russia
Suit on cell: So, my division is like an aborigine, and their division is like a rhinoceros.
Palo Alto, California
Overheard by: Spittake
- Posted on
- California, Philosophy, Suits
Coworker #1 on phone: No, no, I would never say anything to anyone about that.
Coworker #2, as other hangs up: About what?
Coworker #1: Don’t worry, you already know.
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: Doesn’t know
- Posted on
- California, Coworkers, Gossip
60-year-old coworker: I wanna go in the back door.
Supervisor: Okay…
60-year-old coworker: I really like going in back doors.
801 Marquette Avenue
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Overheard by: Porter
- Posted on
- Coworkers, Minnesota, Possible Sexual Harassment
Lady peon: Okay, who put these condoms on my desk?
101 West 31st Street
New York, New York
Doctor to patient with teardrop tattoo under eye: That’s a pretty cool tattoo. Where’d you get it?
Patient, uneasily: Uh… At this place I used to stay.
Doctor: That wouldn’t be jail, would it?
Patient: Maybe…
Hospital
Newark, New Jersey
Overheard by: this guy
- Posted on
- Doctors, Gossip, New Jersey
