Hockey dad: If this snow keeps up, there won’t be any hot-tubbing with the hockey MILFs tonight.
Bachelor: Hockey MILFs?
Hockey dad: You better believe it.
Highways 24 and 401
Cambridge, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: My kid’s on the wrong hockey team
Manager: Yes, next week we’ll all be in Mexico.
Woman #1: I hope you are going to relax this vacation.
Manager: I feel if I don’t run around and see everything, I’m wasting the experience.
Woman #2: Let me explain something clearly to you: vacation is sex, food, sleep, more sex, more sex.
Manager: [Stunned.]Woman #2: That’s why you never come back relaxed. Sex, sex, nap, sex. Repeat that.
Garden State Mall
Paramus, New Jersey
Overheard by: Woman #3
- Posted on
- Advice, Bosses and Underlings, New Jersey, Time Management, Vacation
Nerd #1: Done! Like a bunny, I am quick!
Nerd #2: Like a ninja bunny!
Nerd #1: … A ninja, pirate bunny!
Telephone company
Iowa City, Iowa
Overheard by: Jesus Christ
- Posted on
- Dorks, Geeks, & Nerds, General Idiocy, Iowa
Clerk: This form is made out for June 31st, but there isn’t any June 31st.
Salesman: Why not? Is this a leap year?
Brunswick, Georgia
Overheard by: Julian Calendar
- Posted on
- Dumb Employees, General Idiocy, Georgia
Boss: … So I said, ‘Two words: Go fuck yourself.’
Employee: Three words, boss.
Boss: Whatever.
Hadera
Israel
Overheard by: SmR
- Posted on
- Dumb Bosses, General Idiocy, Insults, Israel
Librarian: Don’t use a potato chip as a bookmark!
Library
Overland Park, Kansas
Overheard by: Manager Guy
- Posted on
- Consultants, Gripes, Kansas
Office peon orienting a temp: And this, well, it may look like a copier, but it’s really–
Temp: –A space ship?
1166 Avenue of the Americas
New York, New York
- Posted on
- Interns & Temps, New York, Technology
Manager: It gets really cold in our office. I haven’t figured out the reason yet, because I’m not a physicist. I think it has something to do with the air conditioning coming on.
California
- Posted on
- California, Dumb Bosses, General Idiocy
Defense attorney at deposition: … And before the accident, about how many times per month were you intimate with your wife?
Plaintiff: Um, probably upper 20s.
Defense attorney, incredulous: Upper 20s?!
Plaintiff: Yeah. My wife is Latin.
9th Street
Sacramento, California
- Posted on
- California, Dumb Employees, Race
Office girl: This magazine says that men, on average, have sex 84 times a year.
Older math geek: Hmmm. That’s like one and a half times a week.
Office girl: What do you mean, ‘half’? There are no half-times when it comes to sex.
Older math geek: Trust me, there are.
Chantilly, Virginia
- Posted on
- Dorks, Geeks, & Nerds, General Idiocy, Virginia
