Dude: I just got back from waxing my board.
Receptionist: Oh, yeah? I noticed your board is long, like my husband's. Must be because you're both tall.
University Avenue
Palo Alto, California
Overheard by: that's what she said
Grad student: How was the meeting?
Neurology professor: It was great, and this time I took really good notes, see? Right here I wrote, "Why is the neurons are gone?"
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: LabCat
Female suit to employee: I'm a weird person and I'm in a weird mood today, so you'd think they'd cancel each other out.
Iowa City, Iowa
Office drone #1: Hey, did you know the new guy was a mix? Yeah, he's half Haitian and half Mexican.
Office drone #2: Really, no way!
Office drone #1: Yeah, really!
Office drone #2: Hmmm, shows what I know about people, I thought he was white.
Madison Ave
New York City, New York
Developer, cleaning out fridge: Wow, I've never seen pink mold before!
Peoria, Illinois
Overheard by: only girl in an office of men...
Cubemate to another: You know, I am thinking and typing at the same time...
Jersey City, New Jersey
Employee, singing on the way down the hall: I need to change my tammmmmponnnnn
Coalinga, California
Temp #1: I have great hearing! Remember the test we'd take in school?
Temp #2: Yeah.
Temp #1: I remember one time you heard that girl, it was on half a zero and I heard it.
Cedar Place
Valhalla, New York
Overheard by: evildead
Loud office coworker a few cubes over: Why don't they make a big belt buckle out of it?
Greenwood Village, Colorado
Overheard by: Probably they shouldn't
Male coworker: What's up with everybody being sick right now?
Female coworker: Seriously! I was sick a few days ago and went to the walk-in clinic. The doctor gave me an antibiotic but I didn't take it. I gave it to my husband because he's sick too.
Male coworker: What do you mean you didn't take it? Why are you being non-compliant with treatment?
Female coworker: Well, this is probably TMI, but I can't take antibiotics. They give me yeast infections.
Columbus, Indiana
Overheard by:
Interviewer: On a scale from 1 to 10, with 1 being the lowest, and 10 being the highest...
Interviewee (interrupting): Do you ever do 1 as the highest and 10 as the lowest?
Interviewer: No, I really like 10 as the highest.
Interviewee, thoughtfully: Yeah, I do too...
Omaha, Nebraska
Attorney: Seamen. (employees chuckle in their cubicles). I just want to say the name.
Wall Street
New York City, New York
Boss, muttering to himself as he walks away: Now, how did I get pennies down there?
New Haven, Connecticut
Office clerk #1: Where did you put the batteries?
Office clerk #2: They go right here on the pole.
Office clerk #1: Wow! I like the long pole...look at it squirt!
Columbus Avenue
Lebanon, Ohio
Overheard by: Did I hear that right?