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10AM Most Meetings Leave Everyone Unsatisfied
Coworker in impromptu meeting between cubicles: I don't mind being yanked, as long as the yanking continues until it's done.
Chattanooga, Tennessee
9AM Why Few People Use Letter-Openers Anymore
Salesman to screaming manager: What happened?
Manager: I just castrated myself!
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: Not Soon Enough
5PM Computers Look You Right in the Eye and Lie
Admin #1: The new software says " loading."
Admin #2: Oh. What does that mean?
Admin #1: It means it's not loading.
Orlando, Florida
4PM Are You Breaking Up with Me??
Boss to underling: I'd better go take my banana skin elsewhere.
Bakersfield, California
3PM Not a Good One
Accountant: I'm anti math.
Intern: Aren't you an accountant?
Kalamazoo, Michigan
Overheard by: Meg
2PM Liza Minnelli Lights Up the Stage in Victor/Valtrex
50-something lady on the phone: Do you want a sexual relationship or not? I thought that's what you wanted. (pause) I thought that's what you wanted! (pause) Yes, Victor, I've been taking my medicine. I've been taking my medicine on the same schedule every day!
Evansville, Indiana
1PM Um, Actually...
Worker: It's not sexual harassment if it's implied.
Orange County, California
Overheard by: Kristina
11AM ...Or Am I Thinking Of 2012?
Locksmith: Yeah, you gotta read "1994." Orson Welles. Really knows his stuff. Everything he wrote in that book is happening right now. You gotta read it.
Sherman Oaks, California
Overheard by: Ja'mie
10AM The Subtext Of Every BP Press Conference
Female cube rat #1: I got gasoline panties and I'm going to hell. Hahahahaha!
Female cube rat #2: Gasoline panties? What?
Female cube rat #1: Gasoline panties! And I'm burning in hell! Hehehe!
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
9AM I Do the Checking-out Here, Sir
Older gentleman with thick Slavic accent, leaning over counter towards male cashier: Oh, those are niiice pants.
Cashier, cheeks reddening: Um, excuse me?
Older gentleman: I don't speak English so good. I am European. Your trousers, they are good. How much?
Wal-Mart
Mountain View, California
Overheard by: lith
5PM Did Dan Brown Finally Find the Body?
Office mole #1: Guess who's not coming to your birthday?
Office mole #2: Jesus Christ?
Parksville
Canadia
Overheard by: Unfortunate bystander
4PM ...But First I'd Like Everyone to Come Take a Good Long Look at It.
Employee, about data extract: Wow! You know, this is kinda big.
Manager: Oh? Just put it in the share drive.
Employee: I think I'll just zip it up before I give it to you.
Manager: What?
Employee yelling: I said I don't think you'll want it, because it's too big to give to you, so I'll have to zip it back up.
Walnut Creek, California
3PM I Paid Extra for That, Too
Coworker to colleague, after phone call: I don't like that ring tone, it just sounds like a woman is breathing down my trousers...
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Mr. Blackwell
2PM Yes, but I Assumed You Supported a Woman's Right to Chews.
Loud colleague to coworkers: Did you eat my teeth?
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: confused but amused
