Get the 10 best quotesby e-mail weekly!
Sensory Experiences All Categories > Topics > Sensory Experiences
Recent | Best Of
1PM Would "Macadamia Melee" Have Sounded Less Creepy?
Minion #1: Oh, yeah, I try not to go shopping during the holidays.
Minion #2: You can't avoid it -- the music, the squealing children, everything -- it's like a peppermint orgy.
Assistant, startled: Uh, what?
12th and Peachtree
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: Say what?
1PM Precious Little of That at My House
Female coworker: So, did you get laid last night?
Male coworker: No, the cleaning crew came in before we could.
Female coworker: Pity. I came in this morning sniffing around for the smell of pussy and latex.
Western Avenue
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: the sugar monster
2PM And While We're on the Topic, How Come You Never Call Me at Night?
Guy on cell: I can hardly hear you. It sounds like you're in a coffin.
Beaverton, Oregon
Overheard by: brian
10AM And Not Salma Hayek, You Know What I Mean?
Worker: I need to go home and brush my teeth. My mouth tastes like Mexican people.
401 North Michigan Avenue
Chicago, Illinois
5PM I See Your Attempt at Humor, and I Refuse to Acknowledge It
Deskie #1: What's that smell? Sulfur? Rotten eggs?
Deskie #2: I have it figured out: It's Halloween, and all these girls are walking around with nothing covering areas which haven't been exposed in public since last Halloween.
Deskie #1: I don't get why that is relevant.
Front desk, Central Michigan University
Mount Pleasant, Michigan
Overheard by: Not A Deskie
12PM No Thanks, I'm Driving
Specialist: Did you know that one of the most recognizable smells is the smell of crayons?
Manager: What about glue?
2700 W Plano Parkway
Dallas, Texas
Overheard by: soolka
12PM Which Was Actually Required by His Last Employer
Female coworker #1: So, what do you think about Henry?
Female coworker #2: He's an odd egg, but a good egg -- at least when he's not licking people.
Wausau, Wisconsin
5PM Everyone Was Relieved When Emo the Magnificent Finally Checked Out
Professor: It smells like fall, doesn't it?
Student: It smells like depressing cold and the inevitable onset of winter.
Brandeis University
Waltham, Massachusetts
Overheard by: I didn't smell anything
11AM But One You Must Learn to Relish Here at Festering Fruit International
Supervisor: A warm banana is an acquired taste.
Park Ave
New York City
2PM You know, I Think I'll Stay Here After All
Guy behind counter on cell: So I'll be there soon....What's that sound?....Oh, yeah! I thought I heard a tornado in the background!
Hall's Archery Range
Manchester, England
11AM A Deal They Were Willing to Swallow
Salesman: They like us. We have a good taste in their mouth.
Bay Street
Toronto, Ontario, Canada
1PM Sir, You Need More Services Than I Can Provide
CSR: OK, sir, go ahead and click on the logo in the top left of your screen.
Customer, on phone: I don't see that. I'm on a page that says "Welcome," then "My Profile."
CSR: OK, go ahead and click on "My Profile."
Customer: I don't see that.
9800 Fredericksburg Road
San Antonio, Texas
Overheard by: Raydran
11AM Actually She Just Had a Cold, But We Take Her Living Will Very Seriously
Employee: You know my friend didn't die the other day when they, uh, disconnected her.
Manager: Oh no?
Employee: But she's dying right now. It took forty-eight hours. I wonder if she's hungry.
365 West Passaic Street
Rochelle Park, New Jersey
Overheard by: Jersey Girl
10AM Why Rome Fell
Employee on phone: My buddy just told me this story about how his wife was so drunk last weekend in a high-end club in the Hamptons, and she ran to the bathroom to puke but never fully made it to the toilet. On top of that, as she was puking everywhere, turns out she was also shitting herself. So now the whole club had to be closed down because it smelled like shit and puke. Isn't that hysterical?
Boss walks in.
Employee to boss: Hey, do you know this club?
Boss: Yeah, I actually went there last Saturday night, but we left immediately because it smelled like shit and vomit.
60th Street & Madison Avenue
New York, New York
Overheard by: holding-it-in
12PM She's One of Those Undercover Deafies
Grease monkey #1: That woman over there...
Grease monkey #2: Yeah?
Grease monkey #1: Is she deaf or something?
Grease monkey #2: Yeah, she's deaf.
Grease monkey #1: But she looks just like any other woman, yo!
Jiffy Lube, Rosecrans Boulevard
San Diego, California
Overheard by: BigWig
11AM Dressing in Hefty Bags Gives You a Certain Latitude
Female cubicle-dweller: Good news! Remember that smell I kept smelling but couldn't find? That garbage smell? It was me!
1009 Lenox Drive
Lawrenceville, New Jersey
2PM Once We Manage to Think Something, We'll Know What It Is We Think
Suit #1: We need a visualization of the vision so we can see the motion and apply it to the organization.
Suit #2: Right!
World Financial Center
New York, New York
Overheard by: misspygmy
3PM In Fact, That's the Dictionary Definition of 'Okay'
Voice over the PA: If you see people in camouflage running around with guns and hear explosions, it is okay.
Hall Drive
Wilmington, Delaware
Overheard by: Zarbettu
12PM No, He's Reading Too Loud
Children's librarian: Do you mind?
Chick with breast exposed, nursing her baby: I'm sorry, is he sucking too loud?
York County Library
Rock Hill, South Carolina
10AM Or Maybe Stop By and Start a Fire
Co-Worker #1: I was just over at [your new boss]'s office, and the first thing I noticed was that it's really quiet over there!
Co-Worker #2: Oh, I know.
Co-Worker #1: No, really, you're going to go crazy! It was almost nine o'clock, and nobody was talking! You'll have to play yourself some music or something.
Co-Worker #2: Yeah.
Co-Worker #1: So I decided what I'll do is call you sometimes and just yell over the phone!
Collegeville, Pennsylvania
3PM Dude, You Have Got to Go Bury That Somewhere Before the Cops Come By Again!
Supervisor #1: I smell mothballs.
Supervisor #2: Probably just my old body.
1143 West 116th Street
Carmel, Indiana
Overheard by: Samantha
3PM Breakroom
Customer service clerk #1: Whew! It stinks in here. Did the bug exterminator guy spray for bugs in here today?
Customer service clerk #2: No, one of the sales reps just walked through. You are smelling salesman cologne.
5760 East Highway 80
Pearl, Mississippi
Overheard by: Brain Dancing
12PM Lunch
BIG bigwig: I had a tunafish sandwich for lunch and all I can smell is tuna. Come here; smell me. Do I smell like tuna?
Smallwig: Nope. I know how you feel though. It just stays with you. Tuna definitely lingers.
Florida State University
Tallahassee, Florida
Overheard by: so hard not to giggle
9AM Back to Work
Data center drone: God! I hate sharing workstations with the night shift. Every day when I come in, my chair smells like ass and the desk smells like armpit. Doesn't [Tim] ever take a bath?
730 International Parkway
Richardson, Texas
Overheard by: El Gee
9AM Back to Work
Engineer: I have this weird beeping signal on my phone. Do I need to dial a 1 when calling this number?
Tech support guy takes the phone and hits redial.
Tech support guy: No. That is a busy signal.
5032 South Ash Avenue
Tempe, Arizona
5PM That's a Wrap
Guy in elevator: Sometimes I look at myself in the mirror and say, "You have no personal power!"
200 Varick Street
New York, New York
Overheard by: Eve's droppings
1PM Head Out for a Bite
Maniac: Come in, I won't bite anymore.
Worker: ...Won't bite...anymore?
Maniac: I usedta work at a veternarian. He usedta lock me up with the animals in a cage! When they'd bark, the only way to get them to stop was to bark at them. And bite them--on the ear!
708 Broadway elevator
New York, NY
Overheard by: Kevin Davidson
5PM That's a Wrap
Office worker: You know how everyone just looks at themselves and sees pure ugliness?
1800 G Street NW
Washington, DC
3PM Smoke Break
Account Exec #1: Your hair looks short today. Did you wash it this morning?
Account Exec #2: Yeah, I contemplated not washing it, but I decided I should.
Account Exec #1: Friday isn't a hair washing day.
Account Exec #2: Well, I didn't wash it yesterday.
Account Exec #1: [Lucy] can go a couple of days without washing her hair.
Account Exec #2: A couple of days?
Account Exec #1: Well, it's more or less a question of whether or not her scalp is sweaty and smelly.
171 Madison Avenue
New York, NY
10AM Exit Interview
Employee #1: So have you heard from [Amanda] since she quit?
Employee #2: No. I called her twice but never heard back from her.
Employee #1: That's because she's probably bitter.
Employee #3: You've tasted her?
138 Greenwood Avenue
Bethel, Connecticut
Overheard by: Dawn Saunders
5PM Pick Up Kids
Teacher on phone: But [Matt], it's just the sound of a gun. The audience won't even see it!...Not even the sound effect?...Are you kidding me?...So, what, we're not allowed to do Hamlet now because somebody has to die in the end?...I know they don't use real swords; we aren't using a real gun!...How is anyone supposed to die?
2155 Napier Avenue
Macon, Georgia
9AM It's Like a Welcome Mat
Co-worker: Does the whole building smell like urine? Or is it just my cube?
1601 Chestnut Street
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
5PM I'm Calling It a Night
Co-worker: Dude, there is something really funky smelling coming from underneath my mousepad.
5215 North O'Connor Boulevard
Irving, Texas
Overheard by: imaninarticluatetool
4PM Call Repairman--again
Teacher: Fix the photocopier, it's not working.
Secretary: What did you do to it?
Teacher: Nothing, it's just jammed, unjam it.
Secretary: Oh my god, what is that smell...what did you do?
Teacher: Nothing.
Secretary: Did you put transparencies in here? Oh my god, you did! Dude! You can't do that! They'll melt! This is a colour photocopier.
Teacher: I wanted colour transparencies.
Secretary: You are so demoted to mimeograph!
557 Church Street
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
9AM Saturday, Please Come Soon
Receptionist: Every time I hear that phone, it's ringing!
3424 Peachtree Road NE
Atlanta, Georgia
4PM Cigarette Break
Manager: Man, I hate that rep. Only he has the power to permeate every fiber of my being with his earnest, sniveling, annoying little voice. "I'm sorry." "Would you mind?" "Is it a problem?" Grow some balls, freak show!
105 Avenue O
Brooklyn, New York
9AM Doctor's Appointment
Nurse #1: It's more important that we get rid of the dead things in the clinic.
Nurse #2: The smell's still there?
Nurse #3: Have you tried spraying the air with something?
1230 York Avenue
New York, NY
Overheard by: Molly the Mole
11AM Schedule Events
Musician on speaker: We are super-psyched, yo. It is huge for us.
Producer: You need to do this show, if you do this show you are going to blow up. Blow up like shit!
441 East 12th Street
New York, NY
9AM Work Stinks
I was sitting at the reception desk in my office and the main door leading to the hallway and elevators was propped open. I could not see into the hallway, but I could hear a man and a woman talking as they waited for the elevator. Eventually the elevator door opened and one of them got on. As soon as the door closed the other person not only let out a huge sigh of relief but also the biggest fart I have ever heard. I thought I was going to die I laughed so hard.
400 Park Avenue
New York, NY
Overheard by: Melissa Berry
10AM Client Meeting
Field Services Manager: I can't believe he brought up all those issues in front of [the client]. He made us look even more inept than we already sounded!
85 E Street
South Portland, Maine
Overheard by: Brian Brinegar
1PM Going Away Party
Manager: Everybody hide and don't make any noise.
Employee: Um, we're in a cube. Exactly where do you want us to go?
Manager: Under the tables and behind the privacy screens. Now everyone shut up.
Employee: Considering John sits right next to this cube and these dividers aren't soundproof, this smoke and mirrors trick really is a failure.
7 Times Square
New York, NY
1PM Go Out to Lunch
Co-worker: Avoid the bathroom in about an hour, you-know-who just sat down to eat some pea soup.
1 International Plaza
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: courtesy flush
11AM The Janitor Was Giving Haircuts
Co-worker #1: Do you know what my office smelled like this morning when I came in?
Co-worker #2: What?
Co-worker #1: Play-Doh.
Co-worker #2: Ugh, gross.
Co-worker #1: No, I liked it, actually.
111 E. Wisconsin Avenue
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
12AM You Just Shouted It Across the WWW
Worker: Why do professional people talk so loud in an office environment? You know what I love? "Kitty-cats!" shouted down three offices.
175 S. Third Street
Columbus, Ohio
12AM We Can Guess How He Got That Way
A woman walks into the ladies' room at work and finds a man and a woman standing by the sinks.
Woman #1: Um.
Woman #2: It's okay, he's blind.
149 5th Avenue
New York, NY
Overheard by: Shannon Bowman-Sarkisian
12AM When Racial Sensitivity Videos Come to Life
Black co-worker: You smell good; what are you wearing?
White co-worker: White Shoulders. I've worn it since I was sixteen.
Black co-worker: Do they make Black Shoulders?
White co-worker: Oh, we'll let you wear the White. This is America!
175 South Third Street
Columbus, Ohio
12PM Actually that's our job, and we overheard you all the way in NYC.
Boss: It's my job to eavesdrop on people. That's why I like to talk really loud, so that when it's quiet people think I'm not here.
Schofield Barracks
Hawaii
12AM Etiquette: The Understood Key to Working Together
Male Co-worker: Are my ears bleeding?
Female Co-worker: I didn't know I was that loud. I'm sorry. I had the volume down.
Male Co-worker: It's just your voice, you're loud. I have excellent hearing. Put it this way, I can hear a snake piss on cotton.
5 Times Square
New York, NY
Overheard by: Tamika J.
