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12PM Signs Your Cabin Pressure May Be a Bit Unbalanced
Flight attendant: ... We don't expect a change in cabin pressure, but if it does occur, a designer oxygen mask will be released in front of you. Secure the mask on yourself first, then, if you are traveling with children, put a mask on the child with the most potential, then put a mask on the other one...
Mother passenger: [Gasps, horrified.]
Flight attendant: ... This is a non-smoking flight, but if you do decide to smoke, we will have you reseated on the wing of the plane where you can watch our feature presentation of Bye Bye Birdie or Gone with the Wind...
Southwest Airlines flight from Kansas City, Missouri, to Tampa, Florida
Overheard by: Jessica
1PM We Export It
Chinese immigrant driver: Everyone is talking about gay marriage. What is 'gay'?
Lady driver: It's, uh, when two men or two women like each other in a, uh, sexual way.
Chinese immigrant driver: Oh! We don't have that in China.
Calgary International Airport Parkade
Calgary, Alberta
Canadia
Overheard by: Girl Driver #2
3PM 'Dear Penthouse' Letters
Man: Are you 21?
Teen girl: I'm 16.
Man: Oh, I was going to buy you your first in-flight drink.
Woman sitting behind them: I'm her mother. You can buy me a drink.
Flight from Michigan to Phoenix
Overheard by: Enigmae
