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1PM What a Fulozer
CSR on phone: And what size product do you have?
Customer: Where do I find that?
CSR: It should be on the front of the label, probably on the bottom.
Customer: No, it's not there. All it says there is 'Eight fulozos.'
CSR: Uh... Do you mean 'Eight fluid ounces'?
Customer: No... It says 'Fulozos.'
1905 Aston Avenue
Carlsbad, California
3PM I Just Hate Being Held Accountable for My Actions
CSR: Thanks for calling Widgets Inc.* How may I help you?
Client on phone: Yeah, I was just talking to Roger* and we lost connection. Maybe you can finish walking me through whatever.
CSR: Sir, we do not have a Roger. You were just talking to me. We didn't lose connection. You hung up on me and I was walking you through understanding that our software does not do "whatever."
Eighth Floor, Galleria
Hoover, Alabama
9AM Wait, Did I Say That Out Loud?
Customer: Here's my order number.
CSR: Yes, how can I help you?
Customer: What can you tell me about my order?
CSR: Um. What would you like to know?
Customer: You tell me. What does your computer tell you?
CSR: It tells me lots of things. What you ordered, when you ordered it. How can I help you?
Customer: Tell me everything your screen tells you about my order.
CSR: What would you like to know?
Customer: No, I want to know what you know about my order.
CSR: Well, I can tell you when it shipped, when it was delivered. Would those help?
Customer: No. What else?
CSR: Well, it would take me a really long time to read you everything I have here.
Customer: Oh. Well, let me explain. [Gives explanation]
CSR: I see. So you just want UPS to pick up this order?
Customer: Are you an idiot? That's what I've been saying the whole time!
473 Ridge Road
Dayton, New Jersey
Overheard by: office peon can't wait for the weekend
5PM That's a Wrap
CSR: This is my senior picture in high school.
Manager: You were a cheerleader?
CSR: Yeah.
Manager: What happened?
730 International Parkway
Richardson, Texas
Overheard by: El Gee
11AM Monitor Calls
Customer Service Specialist on phone: No, sir. You just had a credit line increase yesterday...Well, sir. That's how the potato chips.
Customer Service Specialist: ...Damn towelhead.
14700 Citicorp Drive
Hagerstown, Maryland
3PM Smoke Break
CSR: I just got a call from a guy that was looking for a customer service number for the phone company but he didn't want an automated number, so I told him that most customer service numbers are automated. He told me, "I am a therapist; I know how the phone system works."
6010 Exchange Parkway
San Antonio, Texas
9AM I Swear They Live Here
CSR: Can you give me your daughter's measurements?
714 NE Hancock Street
Portland, Oregon
12PM Update Records
Man: I'd like to change the name on the account. She's been dead for a while now.
CSR: For how long?
170 Utopia Road
Manchester, Connecticut
Overheard by: Mellen
10AM Take Calls
Phone Rep: Sir, are you self-employed?...OK. And do you own the prison?
14700 Citicorp Drive
Hagerstown, Maryland
