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3PM From My Big Book of Conversation Killers
Peon #1: Mmmm... I love these doughnuts. I could even eat them without the icing, the dough is so soft.
Peon #2: Like your flesh.
Tim Mei Avenue
Hong Kong
China
9AM Watch Out! She's Packing an Oozy
Secretary: Stop it... Stop it! I will menstruate all over you!
Citic Tower
Hong Kong
China
4PM The English Don't Think So
Suit #1: He's from England, from some place called Portsmouth. I think it's spelled P-O-R-T-S-M-I-T-H, but it's pronounced like Ports Mouth.
Suit #2: Wait. Is it Ports Mouth, or Ports Smith?
Suit #1: I don't know. It's some place in Europe, I think.
Hotel
Kowloon, Hong Kong
China
Overheard by: Embarrassed American
10AM The Tits, I Just Left There
Man: I've heard that you've been to New York before and tried to be a stripper there.
Woman: Yeah, I've taken my ass back now.
Shanghai, China
11AM E-mail Helen
Employee #1: Helen, what's your e-mail address?
Employee #2: H-E-H-E-Q-I-N@[overheard].com
Employee #1: So that's H-E-E-E--
Employee #2: No, H-E-H-E.
Employee #1: Okay, like "hee hee"?
Employee #2: Yes. Q-I--
Employee #1: "Hee hee chin chee"?
Employee #2: No.
1088 Yanan West Road
Shanghai, China
Overheard by: Tom Will
1PM It's Hard to Pay Attention When You're Speaking in Glyphs
Co-worker: Okay class, now I will read the dialogue to you and
afterwards ask you questions about it.
He reads the dialogue.
Co-worker: So class, I didn't actually hear and don't remember anything that I just said so can someone tell me?
Beijao, Shunde, Foshan
Guang dong, China
Overheard by: lost in translation
12AM That's Depends on Where in Europe She's From
Visiting European account manager: Oh, you have a new cell! I guess it was time to get a new one?
Chinese Project Manager: Yes, this morning I come to work and I am robbed by bandits. So, I have to get a new cell phone.
Visiting European account manager: Ha ha ha ha ha! Ha...ha...Heh. Oh. Oh dear. Are you ok?
Chinese Project Manager (in Chinese): Is she drunk?
188 Dong Cheng Da Dao
Dong Guan, China
Overheard by: Adam White
12PM Whipping Political Slaves Keeps the Weight in Check
Visiting European account manager: Hello [Katie], how nice to see you again. I am back for factory visit!
Chinese Sales Rep: Hi, welcome you to office again! You are look much fatter than last time! Every time, fatter and fatter!
Visiting European account manager: ...yes...well...really...
188 Dong Cheng Da Dao
Dong Guan, China
