Archive for the ‘Texas’ Category

11AM Go Through Inbox

Co-worker #1: Those jokes you emailed were really funny.
Co-worker #2: Yeah they were. Which one was your favorite?
Co-worker #1: Number twelve.
Co-worker #2: Which one was that one?
Co-worker #1: Um, the one right after number eleven, dork. 910 Lousiana Street
Houston, Texas

And They Keep Slipping Out Of the Child Seats

Cube dweller #1: You've worked with giraffes?
Cube dweller #2: Yeah, transporting them is a real pain. They go in an open trailer, and every time you get to an overpass, you have to either let air out of all the tires to fit under it, or you have to stop, back them out of the trailer, walk them around the overpass, get them back in the trailer… It takes forever to get anywhere.
Cube dweller #1: Can't you just teach them to duck?
Cube dweller #2: (long pause) Not at those speeds. Pearl Street
Dallas, Texas Overheard by: Explains giraffe-shaped divots in overpasses

Okay Fine, It Was Paperwork, Okay?

Delivery guy: When I got out of the Air Force I thought I was done with paperwork, but it looks like I’m destined to do paperwork.
Receptionist, uninterested: Oh, really?
Delivery guy: Yeah, but most of my time in the Air Force I can’t talk about.
Receptionist: Uh-huh.
Delivery guy: It’s top secret stuff.
Receptionist: Oh, okay.
Delivery guy: Can’t talk about it.
Receptionist: So don’t. Austin, Texas Overheard by: Waby

At the End of a Stalk

Girl #1, after male coworker receives huge bouquet of flowers: You know, I wonder if he’s doing something to egg her on.
Girl #2: Nah, some girls are like that, you know? It’s called stalking.
Girl #1: You know, I knew a girl like that once. She had a glass eye. 5718 Westheimer Road
Houston, Texas Overheard by: the things i hear around here

Wake Us Up When This Conversation Is Over.

Cube rat #1: So tell me, Bob, you're a college basketball official. Which school in the Big 12 has the worst behaved students.?
Cube rat #2: Well, you would be surprised. It's Baylor.
Cube rat #1: Baylor is a Baptist college… You would think they would be better behaved. Cube rat #2: Well, they are just frustrated because they don't get any… (long pause) championships. Greenville, Texas Overheard by: Mike