Archive for the ‘Crimes’ Category

…By Abducting Them at Knifepoint.

Employee: She owed $1,000 for her electric bill and somehow paid it. I asked her how she pulled it off, and all she would say is “we have our ways.” I assume it was something illegal.
Supervisor: Well… How illegal are we talking here? If it's a felony, never mind; but if it's just misdemeanor stuff, maybe we can get other people on the wagon. Denver, Colorado Overheard by: Should probably leave legal advice to the experts…

3PM Cancer Break

Manager: We’re in Gwinnett County. You need to be 10 feet from the walkway if you want to legally smoke.
Smoker #1: Like, isn’t that unfair? What if you’re a midget? Your feet would be about half the size of mine…No, seriously. Look how big my feet are! They’re like twice the size of midget feet…Oh! You mean like a ruler!
Smoker #2: Yeah, haven’t you ever heard of the metric system? 333 Research Court
Norcross, Georgia