Boss to intern: The gym is a great place for networking. You tend to have a bit more pull with your colleagues when you see them naked in the locker room every morning. Bellingham, Washington
Boss, in response to employees discussing Project Runway: Oh, what is that? A show about airports? Washington, DC
Boss in meeting: Let's send out an e-mail to all employees announcing our new employee newsletter before we e-mail it to everyone, because otherwise people won't read it if it just shows up in their in-box. Minneapolis, Minnesota Overheard by: overcommunication hurts
Manager: We’re in Gwinnett County. You need to be 10 feet from the walkway if you want to legally smoke.
Smoker #1: Like, isn’t that unfair? What if you’re a midget? Your feet would be about half the size of mine…No, seriously. Look how big my feet are! They’re like twice the size of midget feet…Oh! You mean like a ruler!
Smoker #2: Yeah, haven’t you ever heard of the metric system? 333 Research Court
Finance manager: Every time an e-mail outage occurs I'm working on something, and I have to start over. I need you to let me know an hour or so ahead of time next time the system is going to crash.
IT guy: Ummmmm… Auburn, Indiana Overheard by: dru
Bookkeeper: What is Susan’s last name?
Office Manager: Susan who? 812 Moorefield Park Drive
Supervisor on speakerphone: Hold on a sec, I've got another call. Hello, this is Mark*.
Caller: Yes, am I in the right place?
Supervisor: I don't know, who were you trying to reach?
Caller: Is this the number for the internet?
Supervisor: No, I'm sorry, this is a state agency.
Caller: This isn't the internet?
Supervisor: Nope, sorry.
Caller: Oh, darn, okay bye.
Supervisor (back to the other line): Well, that was a first. Newington, Connecticut Overheard by: but please give it my regards. I'm a huge fan.
Engineer: Damn, I'm tired. I was up all night with a case of the number threes.
VP: Number threes?
Engineer: You know, when you think you have to go number two, but actually you have to puke in the bathtub. Paterson, New Jersey
HR rep to boss: You might have to do the down-and-dirty thing. Dallas, Texas
Manager: Can you find these three files in our system?
Ditzy librarian: Sure. It'll either take me five minutes, or longer than five minutes. Mississauga