Why “Can I Help You With Anything?” Can Be a Dangerous Question.

Large effeminate guy with German accent: These are the metallic pencils you do not have! (waves crayola box at employee)
Employee: Okay… Sir?
German guy: Do you know vat I am making? A portrait of Al Pacino! To really capture his manliness! Once I did a picture in charcoal but my art teacher said to really get the effect, I vould haf to burn it! Joann's Fabrics
Los Angeles, California Overheard by: manybellsdown

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3PM Covering All the Bases

Employee: We just need the style guide to spell out everything, in complete detail. It’s mainly for like, legal reasons; to cover our bases.
Intern trainee: Oh. So I guess it’s like how blow-dryer labels say “do not put in mouth while in use.” Not like it’s a pressing issue, but there’s always that one retard that’s gonna fuck shit up.
Employee: Uh…sure.
Intern: OK, cool. As long as I’m getting this. 777 San Marin Drive
Novato, California Overheard by: Max Guevara

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